1.Hell On Heels
I'm hell on heels
Say what you will
I've done made the devil a deal
He made me pretty
He made me smart
And I'm gonna break me a million hearts
I'm hell on heels, baby I'm comin' for you
This diamond ring on my hand
Is the only good thing that came from that man
Got a GTO from one named Joe
And a big piece of land down in Mexico
I'm hell on heels, baby I'm comin' for you
I got a pink guitar, a Lincoln Town Car
From ol' what's his name I met at a bar
I got a high-rise flat in Hollywood
From a married man who wasn't up to no good
I'm hell on heels, baby I'm comin' for you
Then there's Jim, I almost forgot
I ran him off, but I took the yacht
Poor ol' Billy, bless his heart
I'm still using his credit card
I'm hell on heels, Sugar Daddy I'm comin' for you
I'm hell on heels, say what you will
I've done made the devil a deal
He made me pretty
He made me smart
I'm gonna break me a million hearts
I'm hell on heels, baby I'm comin' for you
I'm hell on heels, say what you will
I've done made the devil a deal
He made me pretty
He made me smart
I'm gonna break me a million hearts
I'm hell on heels, Sugar Daddy I'm comin' for you!
2.Lemon Drop
My muffler's tied on with a guitar string
I owe 7,000 dollars to a bank machine
Before this car is ever really mine
And some fine day I'll drive her downtown
Get a burger, fries and a royal crown
Thankin' God that I'll never
Have to pay another dime
My life is like a lemon drop
I'm suckin' on the bitter to get to the sweet part
I know there are better days ahead
I got dirty shirts and worn out jeans
I owe two dozen quarters to a washin' machine
Before these clothes will ever really shine
But I got me a man, that just don't care
If his little darlin's got underware
I know someday I'm gonna be his wife
My life is like a lemon drop
I'm suckin' on the bitter to get to the sweet part
I know there are better days ahead
I got thrift store curtains in the windows of my home
I'm payin' for a house that the landlord owns
Bought a TV on a credit card
It'll take me ten years to pay if off
But some fine day I'll be drinkin' a beer
In a big backyard I own free and clear
All I know, there's better days ahead
So I play my hopes and play my dreams
Just like two coins in a slot machine
Sing 'Glory, Hallelujah' if everything works out fine
My life is like a lemon drop
I'm suckin' on the bitter to get to the sweet part
I know there are better days ahead
Lord I know there are better days ahead
Thank God
3.Beige
Mama planned it all
Said it's pretty in the fall
And the flowers would be
Roses and daisies
And she prayed nobody saw
The weight that I put on
The bride shouldn't be
4 months and 3 weeks
Daddy's pride and joy
Is marrying some boy
And he looked afraid
The preacher turned the page
And I was wearing beige
Nowhere Baptist church
Wrinkles in his shirt
No one's having a ball
At the reception hall
And we didn't take no honeymoon
With what we've got ourselves into
A quick 'I do' and then
Back home again
Daddy's pride and joy
Was marrying some boy
Now everyone in this place
Knows I didn't wait
Cause I was wearing beige
I was wearing beige
4.Bad Example
Somebody had to set a bad example
Teach all the prim and propers what not to do
Nobody around here wants to ramble
What the hell, that's what I was born to do
Those swanky big brick houses don't amuse me
I live in a trailer but I drive a Cadillac
I ain't never tried to impress nobody
I honk every horn and sticker on your back
Somebody had to set a bad example
Teach all the prim and propers what not to do
Nobody around here wants to ramble
What the hell, that's what I was born to do
All of the girls that I grew up with went to college
Their rich daddies bought them a degree
But I'm a third generation bartender
Yeah, and I like livin' from a tip jar week to week
Somebody had to set a bad example
Teach all the prim and propers what not to do
Nobody around here wants to ramble
What the hell, that's what I was born to do
Somebody had to set a bad example
Teach all the prim and propers what not to do
Nobody around here wants to ramble
What the hell, that's what I was born to do
I said, what the hell, that's what I was born to do
5.Housewife's Prayer
I've been thinking about
Setting my house on fire
Can't see a way out of the mess I'm in
And the bills keep getting higher
All I need is a match and a gallon of gas
God I'm getting tired
Gonna set this house on fire
I've been thinking about
Going off the deep end
My man can't get no overtime
And the baby ain't been sleeping
All I need is a washing machine
These hands have gone fading
I'm about to go off the deep end
Ooh, ooh
Well I've been thinking about
All these pills I'm taking
I wash them down with an ice cold beer
And a love I ain't been making
Oh, I feel like I'm burning up
With words I ain't been saying
And all these pills I'm taking
Ooh, ooh
I've been thinking about
Setting my house on fire
6.Takin' Pills
She's on the highest dose of Prozac a woman can take,
She's likes to pop her pain pills with every little ache,
She's got a Tennessee mountain point of view,
If you're gonna have one might as well have two
Raised up right in the hills of Kentucky,
Although she ain't gonna smile 'til she lights up her Lucky,
No filter on her mouth or her cigarettes
Baby what you're lookin' at is what you get
We owe 400 dollars to the boys in the band
Gas lights blinking on our broke down van
We're living on truck stop burgers and fries
Crossing our fingers for a vacancy sign
Well who in the hell is gonna pay these bills
When one's drinking, one's smoking, one's taking pills
She's a rootin' tootin' pistol from the lone-star state
She's mixes up a double at the break of everyday
She might get crazy but she don't get mean
'Til some drunk cowboy asks her to sing
We owe 400 dollars to the boys in the band
Gas lights blinking on our broke down van
We're living on truck stop burgers and fries
Crossing our fingers for a vacancy sign
Well who in the hell is gonna pay these bills
When one's drinking, one's smoking, one's taking pills
Well we ain't ashamed of who we are
We like fast men and cheap guitars
Ain't trying to get rich just trying to get by
By playing for tips on a Saturday night
We owe 400 dollars to the boys in the band
Gas lights blinking on our broke down van
We're living on truck stop burgers and fries
Crossing our fingers for a vacancy sign
Well who in the hell is gonna be pay these bills
When one's drinking, one's smoking, one's taking pills
7.Boys from the South
Maybe he's in Texas, maybe this town
Maybe Oklahoma plowin' up some ground
Southern Carolina, somewhere on the coast,
Maybe Alabama drivin' thru Montgomery right now.
There's somethin' 'bout a boy from the South.
Maybe he's in Florida, somewhere in the pines,
Maybe on the delta throwin' out a line,
Maybe he's in Georgia, starin' at the stars,
Maybe Tennessee pickin' on a guitar right now.
There's somethin' 'bout a boy from the south
Yea, the first time I felt it I was only 16,
And he kissed me underneath the Chinaberry tree.
Said 'Goodnight darlin',' with a sweet southern drawl.
Man, I think I might just have to love them all
My boys from the South.
Maybe in Kentucky, workin' in the mine.
Maybe down in Little Rock, just to pass the time.
Maybe he's somewhere in New Orleans,
Livin' it up in the Big Easy right now.
There's somethin' 'bout a boy from the South.
Yea, the first time I felt it I was only 16,
And he kissed me underneath the Chinaberry tree.
Said 'Goodnight darlin',' with a sweet southern drawl.
Man, I think I might just have to love them all
My boys from the South.
Maybe he's in Texas, maybe this town.
My boys from the South.
8.The Hunter's Wife
He's got 17 coon dogs out in the pen
Ten 11 point bucks hangin' in his den
If he ain't a-huntin' he's a-watching a show
There's things about huntin' that he don't know
And if I was a bettin' woman
I'd lay my money down
I'd bet he spends more time in them woods
Than he spends in this house
I got myself a problem I can't figure no way out
It's like I'm married to a shotgun carryin',
Tobacco chewin', no good blue tick hound
Well, I'm sick of squirrel gravy and I'm sick of coon stew
Fence posts, shock collars, chicken wire, too
If he ain't a-huntin' he's out at the lake
Suckin' on a long neck, changin' his bait
And if I was a bettin' woman
I'd lay my money down
I'd bet he spends more time in them woods
Than he spends in this house
I got myself a problem I can't figure no way out
It's like I'm married to a shotgun carryin',
Tobacco chewin', no good blue tick hound
Go boys...
He may as well be invisible in his Realtree overalls
I can barely see him through the treestand
Seated underwear and turkey calls
The Lord help me with this problem
I can't figure no way out
It's like I'm married to a shotgun carryin',
Cobacco chewin', no good blue tick hound
9.Trailer for Rent
I left the beans on
I put my jeans on
And drove down to the Jonesville News ＆ Times
I said to the man, I need to place an ad
How much will it be for these four lines
Cause my husband's pissed me off for the last time
Trailer for rent, no down payment
Comes with some holes and dents
Where I got tired of his shit
Call if you're interested, trailer for rent
It's been ten years, ten thousand beers
He's still sittin' right there on the couch
I played the misses and I've done the dishes
'Bout time somebody got the hell out
My phone ought to be ringing about now
Cause there's a trailer for rent, no down payment
Comes with some holes and dents
Where I got tired of his shit
Call if you're interested, trailer for rent
There's a trailer for rent (trailer for rent),
No down payment (no down payment)
Comes with some holes and dents
Where I got tired of his shit
You better call if you're interested, trailer for rent
Trailer for rent (trailer for rent)
Trailer for rent
10.Family Feud
Fine china stacked by the kitchen sink
Aunt Tammy's in there claiming all the diamond rings
Uncle Bobby's holding up the TV set
The only thing they're grieving over
Is what they ain't gonna get
She's only been in the ground a day or two
I'm glad mama ain't around to watch this family feud
Great granddaddy's shotgun started it all
She wasn't even cold
Before they ripped it off the wall
Wonda's fighting Angie over antique quilts
Nobody even waited for the reading of the will
If daddy was here he'd beat us black and blue
I'm glad mama ain't around to watch this family feud
I'm watching it all go down in shame
Wish the whole house would go up in flames
Who gives a damn about a cedar chest
When we just laid her soul to rest
She's only been in the ground a day or two
I'm glad mama ain't around to watch this family feud
She's probably rolling over in her grave
Cause the good Lord giveth and the family taketh away
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